Sunday, March 31, 2002
Today was beautiful in the most important ways.
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Taking Mr. Poorman's advice, I am forgoing my plan to do my taxes and clean, by enjoying the beautiful day that is today.
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Saturday, March 30, 2002
A rainy start turned out to be a great day. We arrived in Manhattan around 10:30/11 am and in no time found a decent parking spot on East 10th between 1st and 2nd Avenue's. We quickly made our way to the Veg City Diner where Ms. Davis enjoyed a sloppy joe, a chocolate soy shake, a piece of dutch chocolate cake and I enjoyed a bacon cheeseburger with fries (which Ms. Davis kindly helped me out with), a black and white milkshake and some kind of chocolate cake that didn't have a name. Probably the best part of our Veg City Diner experience was the lovely couple sitting in the booth across from us. I don't think I've ever met bigger morons in my life. Here are a few highlighted quotes.

• "Oooo! Can we sit here? Can we sit here? Can we sit here? Well?"
• To the waiter who was not of a caucasian persuasion, but spoke fluent English: "Can I have cream?" Turns to friend, "Do you think he can understand me?"
• "Oh. Can I have half and half? Do you have half and half?" After getting said cream.
• "You know where people write those graffiti names where you can't even read it? Well, in the bathroom there was this gang stuff written. Stuff like 'vegan,' 'straight' and then 'edge.' Can you believe that gang stuff?"
• "We drove her crazy and she ran off and joined a convent." No shit...
• "This toast is awful. I think this is the worst toast I ever had."
• "I love these booths, you know? I should get some for the loft instead of a kitchen table. Maybe in purple and silver. Wouldn't that be great?"

After our meal, we began our quests. Ms. Davis' quest for all things cute and my quest for some cool, vegan shoes. We stopped at many shops and boutiques and while at Built By Wendy, which had the cutest saleswoman working there, Ms. Davis found her quest. My quest on the otherhand, was not so successful and turned out to be quite fruitless. I was able to stave off attacks to my meager finances by the usually supernatural powers that Ben, Fred and Merc have over me for some reason today. We sat and rested in Washington Square Park. Ms. Davis occassionally took a picture. I ocassionally tripped on something and occasionally I tripped on absolutely nothing at all. Eventually, it became dinner time. After having the Kate's versus VP debate, we headed over to Kate's where we enjoyed unturkey clubs and Ms. Davis had mashed potatos and I had the home fries. For dessert, the raspberry cheesecake stood no chance against Ms. Davis nor did the pumpkin pie stand much chance against me.

At the end of it all, it added up to a great day, a lot of walking, and a lot of driving. I almost made through the whole day, but you know me...
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Friday, March 29, 2002
Off to bed. Waking up 3.5 or 4 hours later and then leaving on an impromptu trip to New York with Ms. Davis.
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Every day is a new day. Every day is a new chance. Every day is a new struggle. Every day is a new hope.
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Thursday, March 28, 2002
From Davey D:

A question to ponder...  As you know this past week the US Supreme Court in a 8-0 decision upheld a federal rule about evictions from public housing which was challenged by several Oakland residents.  The rule being challenged was one in which an entire family can be tossed out of public housing if one member of that family is caught with an illegal substance even if its miles away and the other family members had no idea.  This means if you live in public housing with your 75 year old grandma in Oakland and go to hang out in New York and get busted smoking a joint, that could and has been used as grounds to remove grandma from her residence.  Folks are serious and have adopted a zero tolerance one strike policy drug use in public housing.

My question is this...  Do these same rules apply to President Bush and his brother Jeb in Florida.  If you recall their respective kids got busted with illegal substances and they all live in 'public housing'?  Should this rule have applied to the Senior Bush when are current Pres got in trouble for using cocaine back in the days?  What about other elected officials who have kids who have drug and substance abuse problems?  Will they be evicted from their residence which we pay with our tax dollars-making it public housing?  Think about that for a minute..

Send ODB some love...

Russell Jones 01-A-4392
Clinton Correctional Facility
40 State Road
Dannemora, NY 12929
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Wednesday, March 27, 2002
Does my roommate look at porn on my computer while I'm gone? Nah.
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"This girl was an emotional wreck. I mean she made me look stable."
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Chocolate Kisses.
Yet another lame quiz. How do they figure such things out in only 5 questions?
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"Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people feel good about themselves."

--Homer Simpson

I am a patient boy. I can wait.
No, I'm not trying to quote Fugazi here. Thanks.
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Tuesday, March 26, 2002
saveinternetradio.org
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There is nothing more uncomfortable than the feeling of being in limbo.
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Monday, March 25, 2002
???
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Support. Support. Support.
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1. Late to work today.
2. Left keys and ID for work at home.
3. Go back home to get keys and ID.
4. While at home, debate on whether or not to go back to work.
5. Wuss out and eventually go back to work.
6. Put out some fires at work.
7. Have too many things on my mind right now.

How can one night be so scary and yet so comforting at the same time?
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Sunday, March 24, 2002
This bill is so full of crap! Mr. Haughey says it better than I do though.
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Oh, and thanks to Nitai-priya, I had a great breakfast of waffles, pancakes and homefries, with homemade butter no less! I passed on the butter pecan ice cream though.
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T-I-R-E-D.

Spent the weekend in upstate New York. In general, it was kind of draining with a lot of driving and patience. Still spent some time with people I love and somehow it balances out. Went to a gallery/music thing at this great space in Germantown. Some great art there and good music. The best part is there was no pretense there at all. It seemed that everybody was there to be themselves and have fun. My God, people actually danced to the music! People looked like they were actually enjoying themselves! One band that I thought were really good that played was The Kiss Ups, a two-man show with just drums and bass. The drummer was incredible, but they played forever! Their mantra was "Okay, we've got two more songs..." They said this at least four times. Other than that, the night was really refreshing and in some ways inspiring. Talked to Stain about possible projects, so let's see what happens...

Right now I'm eating muesili with chocolate soy milk. Is that wrong? Anyway, I'm listening to a friend's new record and enjoying more than I thought I would. Surprises are good like that.
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Thursday, March 21, 2002
Off to tackle that rather large pile of laundry in my room. Wish me luck.
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I have been driving myself crazy for the past hour trying to either a) FTP into my site or b) log into my site via the web manager. I kept getting bad username/password errors. The source of my problems? A keyboard with a bad key. Ugh.
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Spooky.
(Free NY Times registration required | via camworld)
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I left my cds at home today. I have nothing to listen to. No rocking out in the cubby-hole today.
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We like it when Ms. Castro is smitten.
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I just received the best subject line for a piece of spam.

"FLEE BITTEN WHORES RIGHT HERE!"

The second day of spring is supposed to be more spring-like. We shall see.
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Wednesday, March 20, 2002
It is miserable out. I am cold and soaked. I feel blah.

Welcome Spring. I love you.
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The snow is beginning to stick. Funny that today is the first day of spring, I believe.
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A mother without child.

"We are not so selfish or self-absorbed not to know that our pain is barely a blip on the meter of world suffering and tragedy. But our small world revolves around our missing baby. Even as I struggle with the sadness that the loss of my son has unleashed in my life, I am comforted by the way my grief returns with faithful potency every time I fear I may be forgetting. It is the gaping hole in my life, where my baby and I were supposed to be together, that reminds me that I am still very much his mother. Whatever I fear now, it is not that my grief will never heal. My greatest fear is that it will."

Mental digestion...
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Tuesday, March 19, 2002
Shift: Why It Sucks To Be Cool
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What to do?
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Where Music Will Be Coming From

"What kinds of things can't be copied? Well, for instance: trust, immediacy, personalization. There is no way to download these qualities from existing copies or to install them from a friend's CD. So while you can score a copy free of charge, if you want something authenticated, or immediately, or personalized, you'll have to pay."

"You've never had oatmeal before!?"
"No."
"Never?"
"Never."
"What are you? Some kind of alien?"
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Monday, March 18, 2002
"God... Why are white people so white?"
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Work is dead. There is no one here. I want to go home.
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Sunday, March 17, 2002
I can't sleep.
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I forgot to mention that today is Trivikrama's birthday. He's the big 3-1.
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A while ago, I had an idea for the name of a studio/production company called the Driver's Seat. I went to go register a domain, driversseat.com, and it was taken by a car accessories company, so I grabbed driversseat.net instead. Although there's no site for this domain (yet), any email that get sent to anything ending in @driversseat.net gets sent to me. Ever since I got the domain, I keep getting email from this person's grandmother, usually cards such as this. For some reason I never email her to tell her she's sending them to the wrong address.

Anyway, if you want to enjoy the site of a singing and dancing shamrock follow this link. And don't forget to show grandma some love. Link only good for the next 30 days.
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Beautiful day out. Sunny and blue skies. Cool but not cold. The air smells good. Where am I? In the cubby hole in the basement. *sigh*

I inadvertently blew off Jerry this morning. Sorry about that, Jerry. I'll see you later today. We'll fix that power supply one of these years.
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Saturday, March 16, 2002
Oh yeah. I got a bad haircut today. The place was packed and I really wanted to get my hair cut, so I got stuck with that old fucker in the back corner that I have seen hack people's heads with my own eyes. Color me stupid. I guess I don't really care as long as it keeps growing back.
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We are currently at Chez Davis. And who is "we," you ask? Why Wee Wee, Max, Jay, Bob and myself, of course. The only person missing is Ms. Davis, herself. We are enjoying tasty snacks and beverages and having an all around good time. You know you wish you here with us rocking out.
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Friday, March 15, 2002
Beware the Ides of March.
(Psst. That's today.)
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Late night. Early morning. Trip to the airport. Currently loving the N.E.R.D. record
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Thursday, March 14, 2002
Words cannot express the way I feel right now.
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Willis pummels the Iceman. Of course it's no surprise to anyone that Tonya Harding kicked some ass. Culture? What's that?
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And suddenly everything that I think is wrong in my life seems so trivial.
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For once:

• I would like to not be a fuck up.
• I would like to not do stupid things.
• I would like to not feel bad about what I am feeling or thinking.
• I would like to be able to think, period.
• I would like to feel good about myself.
• I would like to be able to trust others.
• I would like for things to work out.
• I would like to be normal.

But in reality I am scared of being honest with others and myself, because I think people will take advantage of that and I am afraid of what I will find out about myself. I am afraid of letting people into my life because I am scared of being hurt. I am scared of hurting others in return. I am sick of always doing the wrong thing every single time. I am sick of being reactionary. I am sick of assuming the worst. I am sick of being defensive. I am sick of being insecure. I am vulnerable. I just need to accept that and realize that's okay.

I am tired. I am tired. I am tired.
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Feeling like an asshole. Again.
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Wednesday, March 13, 2002
*sigh*
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A passing dirty look and a half-hearted wave. All I can do is shrug it off.
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At work we have one of those conveyor belt style toasters. Today my bagel literally came out of it in flames. What can I say? We're off to great start!
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Tuesday, March 12, 2002
Things have been quiet around here lately. One reason is that my hosting company recently upgraded their servers and things kind of got screwy. Email? Gone. FTP? What's that? Anyway things are slowly getting straightened out. The other reason is that a lot of things have been happening and my head is spinning a little bit.

You wanna talk jive, Coltrane?
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Sunday, March 10, 2002
I fucked up. Again.
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Wednesday, March 06, 2002
Even though we know it's coming, sometimes the inevitable is hard to take.
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A lot of the times I feel that I do not deserve things that I have in life. With things that have been happening lately, I've been thinking about this a lot more and finding out just how true it is.
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Monday, March 04, 2002
cfd!gdisfh!
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Sunday, March 03, 2002
The back to one of my front teeth just came off. Why yes, it does suck, thank you.
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Friday, March 01, 2002
Running a red light at 4 something-in-the-morning isn't advisable. Especially when the light is front of the police station. Luckily, nothing happened.
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